A friend who brought me flowers said when I gushed over them, "We both like pretty things!" That is something I do know to be true.
I came out of my near death experience feeling at first that I would just pick up where I left off. I would continue down the path I had been exploring before my heart decided to beg for a pacemaker to keep its rhythm. But, now with the pacemaker keeping a perfect beat, my previous path begins to look a bit cloudy. Why is that, I wonder? The response to that question spills from my lips every hour or so the last few days...I don't know. I mutter, "I don't know" out of the blue as my subconscious ponders the future. I don't know.
It's not that I have a sense of needing to take life by the horns and fulfill all my life dreams. It's not that I recognize the gift of life asserted itself and I feel obligated to live it to its fullest. It's not that I find the need for atonement. It's that I got a pacemaker, a body that now functions a bit differently, and a sense of confusion about how this new body might operate with the work I have chosen.
I don't know if this restaurant is a good idea for me any more.
All those days leading up the heart crash were filled with so much stress and exhaustion that I often exclaimed, "I feel like I'm going to die!" Now that I have survived a very real near-death experience, and understand where the faux stress came from, I am a bit shell-shocked, honestly. Is running this restaurant what I want to do with my days? I don't know.
I hear lots of wisdom in the "Give it some time" advice. Time has a way of bringing clarity to most situations, however I feel like the pacemaker was some sort of a sign, but to what end exactly I am not clear. My sense is it has something to do with my work and the restaurant.
Despite my uncertainty, I have decided to give it a chance and reopen this week. It'll be interesting to see how it feels to run the place with all my pistons firing correctly! Next week I plan to make some changes to our hours as it seems unlikely that I will have the stamina to work the 16 hour days needed to be open for both lunch and supper on the same day. I am pondering a lunch only schedule Monday - Friday or a supper only for a few days a week. I may need to play with it to see what works best. It's all up in the air.
In addition to thinking about making changes to the hours, menu, concept, etc., I also think about selling. I've had remarkable success the last few years in making my life completely complicated, and adding this project makes it seem I will never again have a minute of rest! I no longer live in a world where "after work" or "weekend" are a thing. I might want a bit more balance.
So, I am open to suggestions, offers, ideas or contemplations. Plum City, now that you've had a taste of my offerings, do you see a direction I am missing, or a need that 401 Main Street could fulfill? Do we need a small wedding/party/gathering venue? Grab-n-Go Deli?AirBnB? Fancy Hair/Nail/Lash Salon? Anybody want to run a snazzy little farm-to-table restaurant in Western Wisconsin? Or, perhaps you might want the building for some other fantastic idea I hadn't thought of? Let me know. Since I don't know. I am open to suggestions.
Here's another thing I do know. The blueberries are coming in this weekend again at Rush River Produce, so if you didn't pick in July, now's your chance! Call Terry and John for the berry report before you drive far and wide.
The farm store is not entirely neglected! I made a bunch of Blueberry Buckle, Farmhouse Bars, Refrigerator Pickles (Both Bread and Butter & Garlic Dill), Magic Bars with Peanut Butter and a new Shrub - Cherry Basil. Of course, there are all sorts of other sundry fundries too!
The farm store is open daily 9-5 and the Farmhouse World Kitchen in Plum City will be open this week Thursday & Friday 11:30-2 and 5-8 and Saturday 11:30-2:00.
Take good care of your sweet selves!